I lost my cool over the guns issue yesterday. Family and friends were present. All points of view were coming out, some well informed, some not, some emotional, others much to calm for what was going on inside of me.
Finally, I blew up and started yelling. “I hate living here in this country where I worry about the safety of my children and grandchildren. This is the most violent country in the world. If I could go to some place safe in the world, away from here, and could take my loved ones with me, I would do it in a heartbeat.” There was a moment of silence. Then the talking resumed with a calmer tone. Someone threw out some statistics which she got off her phone and others listened with respect.
I don’t like losing control. When I do, I feels like I am feeding the lion instead of the lamb. This was not a calculated show. It was true anger getting the best of me. I wasn’t angry at those in the room, just at the reality of what is happening. They were only bringing the reality into the moment.